Marshmallow Massacre?

            Back before Christmas, I had planned to give each of the young nieces and nephews and other similarly-aged children marshmallow shooters as gifts. 

            Actually I’m not certain about the exact name of these plastic toys that propel marshmallows across rooms and open fields.  Whatever the name, though, the toys promote active play as well as safe play, and the ones I found weren’t expensive, making this a pretty easy decision.

            And then came the tragic shootings at Sandy Hook in Newtown, Connecticut.  

            With that horrendous tragedy, I simply couldn’t bring myself to purchase and then give to little children anything weapon-like.  So much for those marshmallow blasters. 

            Did I think those marshmallows would hurt anyone?  No.  Did I think there would be a marshmallow massacre?  No.  There was just something symbolic about giving a Christmas gift that had anything to do with shooting, even if only marshmallows, so close in time to the Sandy Hook killings.

            Am I moving more toward gun control?  No, unless it’s for parents having more control over the guns in their own homes (and control over the use of video games, television, etc.)  And, no, I’m not trying to outlaw marshmallow blasters either. 

            What we need is to have our elected officials place mental health issues on the front burner.  Period.

Do You Spit Stones????

Sometimes it seems that “being nice” to others isn’t very important to people any more.

And we’ve heard quite a bit about the need for civility during the last year or two or so.

But I guess this isn’t anything new. Apparently, even George Washington stressed civility.

Because we’ve just celebrated Presidents’ Day this week and because the 22nd was George Washington’s birthday, I thought this might be a good time to share some of our first president’s rules of civility. These are some of my favorites from his list of over 100:

When in company, put not your hands to any part of the body not usually discovered.

Sleep not when others speak; sit not when others stand; speak not when you should hold your peace; walk not on when others stop.

In the presence of others, sing not to yourself with a humming voice, or drum with your fingers or feet.

Play not the peacock, looking every where about you, to see if you be well decked, if your shoes fit well, if your stockings sit neatly and clothes handsomely.

Reprehend not the imperfections of others, for that belongs to parents, masters, and superiors.

Gaze not on the marks or blemishes of others and ask not how they came. What you may speak in secret to your friend, deliver not before others.


Undertake not what you cannot perform but be careful to keep your promise.


Speak not evil of the absent, for it is unjust.




Being set at meat scratch not, neither spit, cough, or blow your nose except there's a necessity for it.



Take no salt or cut bread with your knife greasy.

Drink not nor talk with your mouth full; neither gaze about you while you are a drinking.

 Put not your meat to your mouth with your knife in your hand; neither spit forth the stones of any fruit pie upon a dish nor cast anything under the table.



Washington’s list goes on. How do your ideas about civility compare to those of George Washington?

It's About Balance and Drawing Lines

WARNING: This is a serious message, not my usual light-hearted scribbling.

Freedom of speech is awfully important to us, isn’t it? In fact, we hold dear all of our basic freedoms, liberties and rights.

Having the right to do something, though, doesn’t mean that “something” should be done.

For example, in our country, individuals have the right to burn “Old Glory,” our flag, the piece of cloth that is a symbol of our wonderful country. That doesn’t mean people ought to burn the flag, however.

Our citizens have the right to burn the Bible – or the Koran or any other book. Again, recognizing the right to carry out these activities doesn’t mean agreeing that it should be done or that we shouldn’t be repulsed when such takes place.


People have the right to demonstrate and picket, whether they are promoting something or protesting against it.

Yes, we have wonderful freedoms in this country as long as we don’t do harm to others and infringe on their rights.

But, just where do we draw the lines? It’s the figurative locations of those lines that concern me. What has brought up the concern this time?

It’s the Westboro Church members who protested with signs near the funeral of 9-year-old Christina Taylor Green. Those church members have the right to speak their minds, both with words and with signs.

But what about the rights of family members during such unimaginable times of grief and sorrow? Not just Christina’s family but also the families of our military heroes who have given their lives? Where are their rights to privacy?



Do we take away the free speech rights of picketers? Or do we allow the demonstrations but instead restrict the time and place?

For example, should we allow them to march with signs but not within an hour prior to a funeral service until an hour after the service? Do we restrict them to an area outside close proximity to the funeral service and burial site?

This is another time when I have questions but no perfect answers.

What do YOU think?

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O, Civility, Where Art Thou?

What has happened to us as a society? Why are we, generally speaking, no longer civil to each other?


Look at the last 10 days or so. Kanye West’s tirade in the midst of Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech, Joe Wilson’s outburst during the president’s speech, Serena Williams’ obvious crude language directed toward the referee, Federer’s display the following day. 

Since all or most have apologized, it seems they knew they were out of line - at least after the fact.

For decades, presidents have talked about the need for civility. So have others – poets, authors, entertainers and more. Look at the following quotes:

As citizens we have to be more thoughtful and more educated and more informed. I turn on the TV and I see these grown people screaming at each other, and I think, well, if we don't get our civility back, we're in trouble. Emmylou Harris

There can be no high civility without a deep morality. Ralph Waldo Emerson

Civility costs nothing, and buys everything. Mary Wortley Montagu
All of civility depends on being able to contain the rage of individuals. Joshua Lederberg

When once the forms of civility are violated, there remains little hope of return to kindness or decency. Samuel Johnson

Just a few years ago, the SC Supreme Court adopted an “oath of civility” that attorneys are required to take to practice law in South Carolina. How in the world did we get to such a point that the court has to require such an oath?

Is it television? Movies? Is it lifestyle? Is it the lyrics in today’s music? Is it the mudslinging in politics? Is it the 24-hour coverage of everything under the sun? Is it a feel-good society or a lack of personal responsibility in society?

Is it money or greed?  Is it the need to win - at sports, politics or whatever?

I don’t have the answers but certainly do welcome your comments, thoughts and ideas.