1/9/09

Murder By Mustard?

Murder by mustard?
Well, if we were playing the board game “Clue,” there might have been a murder by mustard – Colonel Mustard, that is. This isn’t about the game of Clue or about Colonel Mustard.

Lee Spence is a world-renowned underwater archaeologist. For years he’s been finding and diving on shipwrecks, sometimes bringing up all kinds of treasures.
He’s also my ex-husband who is now married to my second cousin, which means my ex is now my cousin, at least by marriage. Yep, folks, this is the South.
Anyway, this isn’t really about him but it’s about one of his new ventures.
He is making mustard. This isn’t your neighborhood namby-pamby mustard. This mustard is a whole lot more than just something to put on a sandwich.
He makes Murder Mustard and Honey Fire Mustard. These things are HOT! They’re even excruciatingly hot.
I found them on amazon.com under “groceries.” Perhaps they ought to be listed under medicines or cures because this is the best thing I’ve ever found for cleaning out the sinuses – and just about everything else. I believe the Murder Mustard cleans out one’s “innards.”

He used to make this mustard at home (before he was my ex); we sometimes gave some away as gifts. People always wanted more.
Apparently, he’s turning this hobby into a business. The web site says he is also making a cocktail sauce with vodka in it!

Even the labels on the jars are rather spicy and tantalizing. For example, the label on one of the mustards has this warning: "Keep away from children unless you don't like them, and always keep a pitcher of cold beer handy!"
The labels actually provide some entertaining reading.
And, no, I don’t have the recipes for these concoctions. Wish I did.
I need some of that Murder Mustard right now for my sinuses.

3 comments:

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

Me too. I need some for my sinuses too. What a cool thing to do. If it's your passion then you should go for it.

Have a terrific day and weekend. :)

Patricia said...

Wow! You are one gracious lady! I would not mention, let alone promote, anything my ex-husband did.

Rebecca Ramsey said...

Interesting! I bet that's something my hubby would like. He loves to set his tastebuds on fire!

And I must say that you are quite the impressive ex, giving great publicity to your former mate's project!
Hugs to you!
Becky

 
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