If You Don't Read This, A Thousand Flies May Move Into Your Ears

There’s a blogging guy who refers to himself as “Crotchety Old Man.”

Well, today I’m feeling like Crotchety Old Woman.

Just to make certain, I looked up “crotchety” and found these definitions: “capriciously stubborn; eccentric . . . subject to crankiness or ill-temper . . . easily irritated or annoyed.”
Yep, I qualify. All the way.

What’s got me crotchety this time is e-mail. Not all of it; just certain kinds of e-mail.
Generally, these irritants are forwards.
Topping the list are those forwards containing a threat that I must forward to a certain number of people within so many minutes. Failure to do so may lead to death. Well, perhaps not death, but from the tone of these things, it must be the most horrible of fates for failure to forward.

Almost as irritating are the ones to let me know how loved I really am. Send this little flower or heart or whatever to all of your friends and see how many you get back. The more flowers returned, the more friends. Now, isn’t that special?!?!!

Or how about those that tell me if I’m really patriotic, I will forward a message. Or if I really love God, I must forward to a certain number of folks.

Then there are the jokes. Now, I like jokes as much as the next person. If it’s one that brings laughter to the point of tears, yes, I want to see that one. But if the reader barely cracks a smile, don’t bother forwarding that one.

How about the serious messages that cause a lump in the throat or a tear in the eye? Or the ones that provide valuable information about safety and such. Those are really wonderful to get – until I check on http://www.snopes.com/ and find out they are not true. Snopes, by the way, is a great site for checking out fact versus fiction.

Don’t get me wrong; I really like to hear from friends and acquaintances. I’ve read the e-mail that advises that when a person receives a forwarded joke, it means he or she is being thought of by the sender. If you’re part of a routine and large mailing list for forwards, you’re probably not being thought of at that moment by the sender.

So, am I crotchety? Yes. And stubborn and cranky. And easily irritated and annoyed. And eccentric.
You see, there was this e-mail that said if I didn’t forward to 100 people within 5 minutes, I would become an eccentric old woman!


Da Old Man said...

Welcome to the crotchety side. It's like the dark side, only more fun, and much less evil.

Changes in the wind said...

You and me........are two peas in a pod.

Sandee said...

My sister sends me tons of these types of emails. Most of them I just delete. So far nothing bad has happened to me.

As for Snopes, I use them all the time. An excellent verification source on the tons of crud that ends up in my inbox.

Have a terrific day. :)

Going Like Sixty said...

noooo, not two Crotecheties!

Here: try this site: http://www.stopforwarding.us
supposedly allows you to send anonymous "STOP IT" email.

Trying to fix errors by referring to Snopes is futile IMHO. But it's a great site for my own piece of mind!

Linda said...

Very well put! My world hasn't come to end, and I've grown a tail by not forwarding an email that warns me of terrible things to come if I don't follow their directions.

Yes, Snopes is a cool site.

beth said...

Are we NOT supposed to be crotchty? Who knew...

L. said...

What about the ones that tell you that something magical will happen (they promise!) when you forward the email on to 9 other unsuspecting (fools) friends?

Puleeze. I'm still waiting...so far, no magic!

Great post! : )

Dragonstar said...

And if you forward this to five people, a leprechaun will dance.... never has yet!

How come, if so many of us agree with you, there are still so many that deluge me with these things - and particularly on a Monday morning?!

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