Celebration of Life

Thanks to all readers of this blog who have tolerated my several posts about brother Rod.  Writing has been therapeutic - and enjoyable.  The enjoyment has come as we've recalled good times with Rod and some of his funniest antics and escapades. 

The funeral was indeed a celebration of his life.  One of Rod's trademarks was a bright Hawaiian-style shirt.  Well, not one -- but many.  Mom said she counted 42 of those shirts in his closet.  He never wore anything other kind.

So, as part of the celebration of Rod's life, we wore shirts out of Rod's closet.

In Fellowship Hall at St. Peter's Lutheran Church after the funeral.

Pictures of Brother Rod -- A LONG Time Ago -- When He Was Cute!

So many wonderful remembrances of brother Rod have been pouring in.  Most of these pictures are from Christy, one of my sisters. 

Rod as Uncle Sam

Family Picture - Rod is in the back

Family Picture - With All Five Children

Rod with Baby Christy and Big Sister Sherry

Rod is on the right; he used to take tap dancing

Maybe Rod and Christy were ready for Halloween or maybe they were just playing "dress-up."

Remembering Rod

Ever since we learned Wednesday morning that it might be brother Rod’s last day here on earth, I think some of us have been moving like robots, going through motions, doing what we needed to do.

It’s around midnight now, and I can’t sleep. I’m tired. Very tired. But I still can’t sleep. So, I'm writing what I'm thinking - and posting without proofing.

It’s just hitting me that Rod is gone – forever. Some wonder what it’s going to be like on the political scene without him.

I wonder what it’s going to be like at Christmas, Thanksgiving, family gatherings and such. I wonder what it’s going to be like not having him to call, e-mail or text when I have a question. I wonder what it’s going to be like not having him making fun of me – good-naturedly, of course. (I think.)

Fun times, crazy times, tense times – all of these come to mind tonight. All kinds of random thoughts.

I think back about the two times when our family was on “Family Feud.”

I think back to the 1980’s when our parents had just moved back to South Carolina from Tennessee; Rod was chairman of the county Republican party and was trying to recruit candidates. Dad had to go out of town for something; Rod asked him to sign a blank form as a candidate before he left town, just in case Rod couldn’t find a candidate for some office. When Dad returned, he learned he was a candidate for the state Senate. Rod ran his campaign. They won.

I remember playing board games with family members. Rod was fun to play with – and also frustrating to play with. He knew too much, especially insignificant things.

I remember a “fuss” we had when I was driving in California (when we were out there taping “Family Feud”) and Rod had to go to the bathroom; he wanted to stop at a service station. Instead, I stopped at a hospital, insisting this was a clean place and better than a gas station. He protested, but finally went in. And he was gone forever, it seemed. Back and forth, we wondered if someone had caused a problem for him or if he was just being stubborn by not returning to the car promptly. (Use your imagination to figure out why he was gone a while.)

Rod and I didn’t always agree on candidates. There were times I didn’t want to know which campaigns he was running.

We didn’t always agree on the best approach in a campaign either. During one of my candidacies, he told me that if I wanted to have a shot at winning, I should just leave town so people wouldn’t get to know me.

I remember him describing an easy job one time.  Bear in mind, he was often controversial and colorful.  He said he had been retained by a candidate to "do nothing."  In other words, don't work for him, don't work against him.  Easy money, huh?

I remember some of the great campaign slogans he came up with - for me and for others.  He was a creative genius!

I remember when his favorite color was “geen.” He just couldn’t pronounce “green” and called everything “geen.”  (By the way, this was a long time ago; he eventually learned to pronounce "green.")

I remember when I won a spelling bee in school. He ran to Mom that night and told her my news first – and I was SO mad at him for not letting me tell my own good news.

I think back about delivering the eulogy at Dad’s funeral without breaking down. This was probably because Rod told me beforehand that I wasn’t going to be able to do it.

(photo "lifted" from Wolfe Reports blog)

I recall when he took me to the golf course to teach me how to play golf, ending the day by saying he'd never do that again.

I remember that, for a long time, he drove the junkiest van in the whole world.  Returning from a political meeting in the Charleston area late one night, he realized he couldn't see through the windshield clearly.  The windshield seemed dirty, maybe blocked with a multitude of papers, notes and books.  After a while, though, he realized a snake had taken up residence on his dashboard. 

I remember family Charades games and one particular time when we played a joke on Rod, giving him something embarrassing and almost impossible to act out – and with his own team members planning ahead NOT to guess the correct answer.  Can you picture him trying to act out "The Vagina Monologues" while his team members played ignorant?  It was hilarious!

I remember when Rod and Shawn (my other brother) made the trip from Columbia to Charleston by water, skiing behind a boat, emulating what our dad had done on a few occasions many years earlier.

Which reminds me of something else: when Mom was pregnant with the fourth child after a10-year-break of not having children, the three of us already in existence got to help pick names for the new baby. Rod wanted to name him Sidney after our dog. Rod’s choice didn’t win, but he called the new brother “Sidney” instead of Shawn for quite a while.

I remember him rounding up as many people as he could to go to bowl games in an old delivery truck, complete with printing press, ink and all sorts of stuff. As a game ended, they’d start the presses, printing bumper strips and signs with the final scores, and selling them to happy fans.

I remember him playing his guitar and singing, often entertaining crowds and never meeting a stranger.

I remember his laugh, especially when he got started laughing and couldn’t quit.

When I got the call Wednesday morning about his sudden and dramatic change, I was with my two-year-old grandson. No doubt, he could sense that something was wrong, and he looked at me quizzically. I told him, “My brother is sick.” Harrison said, “Go get him.” I told him I couldn’t because my brother was in the hospital. Again, he said, “Go get him.” I told Harrison that I couldn’t, that I thought my brother was going to live with Jesus. In a typical two-year-old style, he said, “Come sit ‘side me.” I did, and he rubbed my back.

Rod singing to Shawn's daughter, Kendall.

Rod would have liked that, because there was a side to Rod that I remember so well which many people never got to see. He was very sensitive and tender-hearted. Oh, yes, he fought hard in political races, but he had a heart of gold.

Our family will never be the same, but we’re a richer family for having had him in our midst.

                            December 22, 1953 - August 18, 2010

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Today I Lost My Brother

Today I lost a brother.

I hadn't planned to post about him tonight but, somehow, just needed to.  It's therapy of a sort.

Brother Rod, 56, was my Christmas present when I was four years old. At the age of 4, a baby brother isn’t exactly what a little girl has on her holiday wish list.

Over the years, Rod turned out to be a great present.

And he wasn’t just a gift for me.

Rod was a gift to many people. He ran winning campaigns for lots of candidates who probably wouldn’t have won without him

Rod met the big “C” with his first diagnosis many years ago; it was melanoma.

Two years ago, he had a cancerous brain tumor. He had surgery in August 2008; one hour after the brain surgery, he was on the cell phone doing business as usual. Rod quipped: “I can see the headlines now: ‘Shealy Survives Surgery; Dies of Boredom’.”

That surgery removed the tumor – totally – and he was fine.

At least for a while.

Some time during the summer of 2009, he learned that the cancer was in his lungs.

This year, we learned it was back in his brain.

Rod, with cancer eating at his brain and lungs, was still running political campaigns and trying to carry on as usual for the June 2010 primaries.

Just last weekend, he was in his office when he fell and broke his hip. He was scheduled for hip replacement surgery today but had massive bleeding in his brain this morning and was unresponsive.

Rod had maintained a very positive and upbeat attitude. Sometimes he said things like, “The folks at the hospital like me ‘cause everybody else is sick.”

I first ran for office in 1970; he helped me in that campaign and then ran every campaign of mine after that one. He ran my campaign for lieutenant governor in 1990; it’s was my first loss and I believe he took it harder than I did.

But, like with any loss or any setback, he bounced back quickly.

When I asked him several years ago if it was too late to throw my hat in the ring for a particular race, he replied, “Yep. By about 34 years.”

Whether it was politics, family, or anything else, Rod enjoyed life to the fullest. He had a dry wit, a keen sense of humor and a heart of gold. He loved to play the guitar and sing. He loved being creative.

Other than in the hospital bed, I can’t remember the last time I saw him without a bright floral Hawaiian shirt. That was one of his trademarks. In fact, he went to an inaugural ball; like others, he wore a tuxedo – but with the Hawaiian floral print bowtie and cummerbund, along with tennis shoes, I believe.

He adored his two grandchildren; they adored him as well and called him “Rod-Boy.”

Other than Mom, I’ve known him longer than anyone else, and I will miss him more than anyone can imagine.

What a valuable Christmas present he was!

To read his own views about life and death, click here:  http://blondesherry.blogspot.com/2010/08/ww-say-little-prayer-for-my-bro.html

PH: ORANGE - in Sports, Recreation, Nature and Even Politics???

What fun I had with this week's Photo Hunt theme.  It's orange.  What in the world would I find that was orange?

As it turns out, there's a whole lot of orange around us.  And I even came across a picture that's over 25 years old that has orange in it. 

Sometimes there's orange in beautiful sunrises and sunsets. 

Do you see the orange halo around this Summerville street lamp?

I just happened to see an orange bike in a local parking lot.

Heavy machinery might be orange, like these two pieces of equipment at a local rental place.

The name of my blog might be "EX Marks the Spot" but, in these next three pictures, orange marks the spot - or spots - for work to be done.  Orange paint, orange flags, orange signs.

Okay, here's the really old photo - over 25 years old.  Tree, my son (now an attorney in DC who will kill me if he sees this photo) is wearing an orange life jacket.  Behind him are nephews Ross and Rodney (partially hidden) and daughter Tiffany.  Yep, they'll ALL kill me!

Yes, I'm being grandma again.  Orange gave me the opportunity to share another picture of grandson Harrison.

Quite a few sports teams have orange as one of their colors.

In South Carolina, orange means the Clemson Tigers.  Their blood runs orange.

And speaking of South Carolina, here's a picture from The State newspaper of Mark Sanford, our "Luv Guv."  If you're not from South Carolina, "orange" you glad he's not your governor?

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To see other Photo Hunt participants and their orange posts, click here.