One of My Very Best Talents

One of my best talents is gaining weight. I mean, I am really good at it.
It takes practice to get good at something, and this is one of those somethings that I’ve practiced a whole lot.

Years ago, I was petite, both in height and in weight. Now I am less petite in weight and more petite in height. Yep, I’ve gotten shorter and much, much wider.

When I was pregnant the first time, I gained 50 pounds. After all, I was eating for two.

And there was always the chance that it could have been twins or triplets, so perhaps, I thought, I was eating for more than two.

Let’s not take chances, okay?

Do you know what it’s like to give birth, go back home and still have maternity clothes that are too SMALL???

When I was pregnant with the second child, I gained another 50 pounds.

With the third child, I gained only 38 pounds. Of course, I hadn’t lost the first 100 pounds gained during the previous two pregnancies.

In other words, I gained a whole ‘nother adult giving birth to three children. That was a total of 138 pounds.

This caused problems for other people as well.

Two weeks after my son was born, I was in the check-out line at the grocery store. When it was my turn, the cashier looked at me and said, “You haven’t had that baby YET?”

Well, I couldn’t lie to her and say that I had not had the baby, so I had to tell her the truth.

She was so embarrassed when I answered that yes, I had given birth two weeks earlier.

It’s pretty bad when a person’s weight gain causes embarrassment for other people!


Syd said...

I like your humor and your honesty.

Patricia Rockwell said...

I have determined that there is only ONE way for me to lose weight. That is to stop eating completely.

Margo said...

No fair! I've kind of noticed lately I stay the same weight no matter what... might as well eat the whole damned cake! Love the barbie picture :)

Chatty Crone said...

Why is it so hard to lose one pound and so easy to gain 3 overnight?????

SLT said...

" It’s pretty bad when a person’s weight gain
causes embarrassment for other people! "
as a general rule, people should not be allowed to ask "when you're due." Ha. Thanks for the laugh!

SLT said...

People should not be allowed to ask questions regarding pregnancy. It happened to me shortly after having a daughter, and I wanted to dropkick that lady! Thanks for the laugh!

Unknown said...

I have never lost the weight I gained when I was pregnant, and my youngest is 33 years old. I have also not lost the baby weight I gained when I learned I was going to be a grandmother for the first time 12 years ago. I probably never will.

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